Becoming One

What does it mean to “become one?”

Genesis 2:20b-25

But for Adam no suitable helper was found. So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh.  Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. 

23 The man said,

“This is now bone of my bones

    and flesh of my flesh;

she shall be called ‘woman,’

    for she was taken out of man.”

24 That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.

25 Adam and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.

God intended man and woman to become one flesh in marriage and to unashamedly experience sexual intimacy. The following thoughts and information on sexuality and bonding are intended to help couples better understand this union. 

Becoming One or Creating a Bond

The hormone Oxytocin, plays a significant role in forming of a bond or creating a sense of trust.

Oxytocin: AKA–The Bonding and Trust Hormone

What is Oxytocin?

Oxytocin is a powerful hormone. When we hug or kiss a loved one, oxytocin levels drive up. It also acts as a neurotransmitter in the brain. In fact, the hormone plays a huge role in pair bonding. Prairie voles, one of nature’s most monogamous species, produce oxytocin in spades. This hormone is also greatly stimulated during sex, birth, breast feeding—the list goes on.

Above taken from: http://www.psychologytoday.com/basics/oxytocin

Sexual intimacy and affection increase oxytocin, especially for couples already feeling love for one another to begin with. This is important because increased oxytocin helps strengthen the feeling of bonding and trust between two people, ultimately encouraging the Biblical idea of the two becoming one.  Men have lower levels of it than women. It is especially increased for men in sexual intimacy.  Women tend to experience an increase, in addition to sex, through a variety of emotional connections with loved ones. This may explain why men often feel more loved when they are sexually intimate with their wives and women feel more loved when they have emotionally connected first.

When chemical bonding has occurred in the brains of two lovers, a break in the relationship can lead to major emotional distress. The brain literally has to recover from the broken bond. To read more about this concept, clinical neuroscientist Daniel Amen, writes on this subject in a couple of his books: Change the Brain Change Your Life and the Brain in Love.

A healthy marriage can help protect your mind. Come back often for more information on how to keep your marriage bond strong.

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The resources on these pages or anywhere in the blog are not intended to substitute for a clinical counseling relationship, or to be used as medical or counseling advise or intervention. Making use of the tips, applying the content, or any engagement the reader may have with the pages and posts of this blog site, does not represent a professional counseling relationship or personal relationship with Christina L. Russell, LPC, NCC or Counseling Center for Living Well, PLLC.
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